It’s been a long week, substack and friends. Zoe learnt how to say “a little bit sick” and my life in this one small change became infinitely more stressful. “Zoe sad, mommy. A little bit sick.” Makes sad face.
“Oh no honey, what’s wrong, do you have a boo boo?” “Yea.” “Where’s the boo boo?”
“My hair!” Shows me she dipped a strand of her hair in porridge.
I’m so glad you’re progressing and learning, sweet child. And i’d also like to know why that has to result in me having multiple heart attacks per minute.
“I have a tummy ache, mommy!” I jump up. What I see the next moment is a child standing happy and tall, smiling ear to ear, rubbing her belly. Tummy ache is one I hear often. I’m not sure what she thinks it means, but so far it hasn’t meant what I think it means even once. I jump up every time. I’m a Jewish mother, after all.
Here’s the great mindfuck of being a parent: I KNOW that colds, flus, tummy aches, and stomach bugs, they’re all fine. But my brain still goes: “what if it’s a rare tropical disease they have never heard of and don’t know how to treat and it’s going to make us all horribly sick and then we’re all going to die and nobody will ever know why?”
Today she had a sore throat. She told me herself and I believe that one because I also have a sore throat. I also suddenly have an achy back and not so suddenly feel exhausted by everything. That’s all to tell you that I am writing this in my bathtub. Not only am I writing this from my bathtub, I’m writing this from my bathtub while eating a hot Nutella covered cheesecake with a Ferrero Rocher on top with a side of gelato.
Once dinner and bedtimes were over I remembered I can also make a sad face. I made a sad face and sighed and sighed. “Oh if only I had some dessert…” I said.
“Why don’t you go to the shop?” Julz said.
I just made an even sadder face. “Why don't YOU go to the shop?!” the face said. My mouth said nothing and just sighed until I got this text. Just in time, all this signing was starting to have a hyperventilating effect.
They were not lying, this is heavenly.
I’m sorry that I don’t have a story for you today. I have an early bedtime for myself planned, so I will tell you one tomorrow.
Much love you nice person you!
I had a couple of chocolate mochi this evening. Massive amount of chocolateyness in such tiny parcels. Delectable.
We’ve been on a strong ice cream kick since Bryan’s surgery. I don’t hate it.